Wednesday morn.
1726

Absent from you, & unable to relish anything
that does not relate to you – How eagerly do I fly for Releif to this
Dear Intercourse! No absence {^^can} Prevent us from thus Exchanging a thousand
soft, & Tender Expressions, from Disclosing the Kindest Sentiments of our
Souls, & by that means maintaining in its Vigour y^e Passion that first
united them.
I am most agreeably Interrupted by y^e arrival of {^^the} second Happiness I have
known since y^o Left me – My Dearest angel! I {^^am} charm’d w^th your
goodness, & these Engaging Marks of your Tenderness – I must be Ever
sincere w:^th you, & therefore will own I am so far from being Disturb’d
at the Little, kind inquietudes you Express in y^e Beginning of this
Dear Letter, that I am pleas’d to find I am of consequence enough to
occasion them: I fancy I need not use many argument on this Head,
Let every action of my Life, My Cares, My Fondness, My Reluctance to
part from you, & excess of joy at your Return plead for me – if these are
Instances of Cold Respect only, I am Guilty, & you ought to Condeem & Hate
me. I should think my self Happy it is were possible for you to know

[f.90v]

Every Thought that Rises in my Heart, How many Tender Evidences, would
you there find of undiminisht Passion! Beleive me, my Eternal Delight!
From y^e first moment I saw you, I rec^d a Just & strong Impression of
your merit; a Longer Acquaintance has confirm’d w^t your Looks then
only Engag’d me to Imagine you are now under no obligations to fancy,
Tho’ I still fancy you the most amiable man breathing, yet ‘tis Judgment
& conviction that makes me know you are the Most Worthy.
I had written to you, my Life! By Tuesdays Post, but was {^^so} very ill with y^e
Headake, & anxxx unaccountable Disorder upon my Spirits, that I chose to/del>
Rather to omit a Post, then apply my self to you, under so disagreeable &
uneasie circumstances, I hope by this time you have receiv’d mine of
Sunday Last, & hope also you will Let every opportunity bring me an
account that you are well, & continue to be mine, w:^th a Tenderness, w^ch:
Even y^e name of Love, but faintly Represents, that w:^ch I feel for you.
I am {^^not} woman enough to Blame y^o for y^e Pains you have taken to serve
y^r freind, But am a Little Jealouse of y^e arguments you might use to
Prevail w^th him, forgive me, My Hearts Dearest Joy! & don’t suffer your
self to reflect on anything that may give you pain – if an involuntary
Thought will now, & then present its self to you, oppose to it, y^e Idea of
our Past Happiness, & Hope of Future - - w^t are all Low, & mean
Considerations to y^e Hours we have known!
The Trust, Security & Mutual Tenderness
The Double Joys, when Each was glad for Both
Adieu, My Own Madan, My Eternaly Dearest Soul! Adiue!
Ju: Madan

Wednesday morn.
1726

Absent from you, & unable to relish anything
that does not relate to you – How eagerly do I fly for Relief to this
Dear Intercourse! No absence {^^can} Prevent us from thus Exchanging a thousand
soft, & Tender Expressions, from Disclosing the Kindest Sentiments of our
Souls, & by that means maintaining in its Vigour y^e Passion that first
united them.
I am most agreeably Interrupted by y^e arrival of {^^the} second Happiness I have
known since y^o Left me – My Dearest angel! I {^^am} charmed w^th your
goodness, & these Engaging Marks of your Tenderness – I must be Ever
sincere w:^th you, & therefore will own I am so far from being Disturbed
at the Little, kind inquietudes you Express in y^e Beginning of this
Dear Letter, that I am pleased to find I am of consequence enough to
occasion them: I fancy I need not use many argument on this Head,
Let every action of my Life, My Cares, My Fondness, My Reluctance to
part from you, & excess of joy at your Return plead for me – if these are
Instances of Cold Respect only, I am Guilty, & you ought to Condemn & Hate
me. I should think my self Happy it is were possible for you to know

[f.90v]

Every Thought that Rises in my Heart, How many Tender Evidences, would
you there find of undiminished Passion! Believe me, my Eternal Delight!
From y^e first moment I saw you, I rec^d a Just & strong Impression of
your merit; a Longer Acquaintance has confirmed w^t your Looks then
only Engaged me to Imagine you are now under no obligations to fancy,
Though I still fancy you the most amiable man breathing, yet ‘tis Judgment
& conviction that makes me know you are the Most Worthy.
I had written to you, my Life! By Tuesdays Post, but was {^^so} very ill with y^e
Headache, & anxxx unaccountable Disorder upon my Spirits, that I chose to/del>
Rather to omit a Post, then apply my self to you, under so disagreeable &
uneasy circumstances, I hope by this time you have received mine of
Sunday Last, & hope also you will Let every opportunity bring me an
account that you are well, & continue to be mine, w:^th a Tenderness, w^ch:
Even y^e name of Love, but faintly Represents, that w:^ch I feel for you.
I am {^^not} woman enough to Blame y^o for y^e Pains you have taken to serve
y^r friend, But am a Little Jealousy of y^e arguments you might use to
Prevail w^th him, forgive me, My Hearts Dearest Joy! & don’t suffer your
self to reflect on anything that may give you pain – if an involuntary
Thought will now, & then present its self to you, oppose to it, y^e Idea of
our Past Happiness, & Hope of Future - - w^t are all Low, & mean
Considerations to y^e Hours we have known!
The Trust, Security & Mutual Tenderness
The Double Joys, when Each was glad for Both
Adieu, My Own Madan, My Eternally Dearest Soul! Adieu!
Ju: Madan