I am not sat Down to Indulge My Self in y^e pleasure of Communiting my Soul
To its Dearest Part --- tis now a whole fortnight since you left me; sure
My Dear, Dear, Creature! To Love you as I do, to think of nothing but you,
Is in some measure to Deserve y^e Blessing of being yours? You think of me,
Our Souls are not Separated – mine went away with yours; wⁿ will you
Come & restore me both? Your letters are y^e only pleasures I Injoy – I receive
them as Valuable testimonys of your remembrance of me – could you but know
my Impatience till they come – my Happiness when that impatience is
gratifie’d – you would my Dearest, think the moments you gave me, well
Employ’d: Imagine wⁿ you are writing to me; every Line you add,
Strengthens y^e Satisfaction of a gratefull, faithfull Friend, & your good nature will
prevail w^th you to go on, & bestow more Happiness then it is in y^e power of your whole sex beside to give. I believe I need not tell you I am
never weary of writing to you, y^e length & number of my Letters are a
Sufficient proof of it, Even at this distance I live more to my Madan
then my self, all my thoughts are his, all y^e moments of Ease I feel,
are Entirely owing to him, his Dear, render assurances give me a pleasure
I am glad my Heart has generosity enough to be sensible off; I am pleas’d
y^t every Sentiment of Gratitude y^t Rites in my Soul, & don’t Dispair but
in time your Passion will make me become worthy of its self – my
best, My Dearest Creature! are not y^e happy Hours we have known, Dear
Your remembrance? Let your hand repay me by writing, y^e thousand
kisses I have given it – I Expected y^r last would have said something
Of your coming, indeed, my Dear Madan, I Begin to think y^e time
insupportably tedious, the middle of May will soon I hope make you
Claim y^e promise you told me was given You – I want to have you come
& improve my prospects, this place wants only you, to make it perfectly
agreeable, at least to me, who cannot take a Joy in Life w^thout my Madan

[f.56v]

Do you miss me? Or does absence begin to Grow cosy to you? Tell me
your whole Heart, have not I a right to its most secret thoughts? If y^t right
Is due to a faithful Freindship – to a Tender, Unalterable Love – I may
Venture to say I have – I Love you, My Dearest Life, with a Passion y^t
words were never form’d to Express – your Health & constant Happiness xx
Is y^e Strongest wish of my soul, I never Imagine a Joy or frame an Idea
Of compleat satisfaction for my self, y^t you do not begin, & End: I desire
To Live no Longer then I can conduce to your Happiness, while you can
Continue to Love me, And make me part of y^t happiness, I am of
Consequence in y^e world {^^{& ye most completely Blest creatures in it}} – but if ever I am unhappy enough to survive
your regard, if you change Love, for Respect, & Look with coldness, &
Indifference on me, instead of Tenderness, & Love – w^t can Support me, &
Reconcile me to my self – all my Value, is what you give me in your
Esteem – your Love – If Heaven will grant my most ardent wishes,
I shall Live, & Dye, in y^e full Possession of Both. remember, my Dear
Soul, my fate in this world is in your hands – My Peace, my every
Joy Depends on you - & in y^t Dependence consists my greatest happiness,
The Sympathy between us is too strong, not be lasting – adieu my Dear
Life! till to morrow –
Tuesday morning – I reserv’d a small part of my paper, till to day, I am
Pleas’d y^t not one whole day should pass w^th: my giving you some mark of
Continual remembrance of you, My Dear, Dear, Creature! W^th what more
Then Impatience do I wish for your Return? Think when you set out for
This place, then is a mortal, on xxx whom your sight will Bestow perfect happiness
My Best Lov’d angel! Believe it is not in y^e power of fate to make
Me less y^rs, in Heart, & Soul, & every thought & inclination of Both,
No fate, no Fame, no Fortune can remove
The Well place’d Bans of my Constant Love

I am not sat Down to Indulge My Self in y^e pleasure of Communicating my Soul
To its Dearest Part --- tis now a whole fortnight since you left me; sure
My Dear, Dear, Creature! To Love you as I do, to think of nothing but you,
Is in some measure to Deserve y^e Blessing of being yours? You think of me,
Our Souls are not Separated – mine went away with yours; wⁿ will you
Come & restore me both? Your letters are y^e only pleasures I Enjoy – I receive
them as Valuable testimonies of your remembrance of me – could you but know
my Impatience till they come – my Happiness when that impatience is
gratified – you would my Dearest, think the moments you gave me, well
Employed: Imagine wⁿ you are writing to me; every Line you add,
Strengthens y^e Satisfaction of a grateful, faithful Friend, & your good nature will
prevail w^th you to go on, & bestow more Happiness then it is in y^e power of your whole sex beside to give. I believe I need not tell you I am
never weary of writing to you, y^e length & number of my Letters are a
Sufficient proof of it, Even at this distance I live more to my Madan
then my self, all my thoughts are his, all y^e moments of Ease I feel,
are Entirely owing to him, his Dear, render assurances give me a pleasure
I am glad my Heart has generosity enough to be sensible off; I am pleased
y^t every Sentiment of Gratitude y^t Rites in my Soul, & don’t Despair but
in time your Passion will make me become worthy of its self – my
best, My Dearest Creature! are not y^e happy Hours we have known, Dear
Your remembrance? Let your hand repay me by writing, y^e thousand
kisses I have given it – I Expected y^r last would have said something
Of your coming, indeed, my Dear Madan, I Begin to think y^e time
insupportably tedious, the middle of May will soon I hope make you
Claim y^e promise you told me was given You – I want to have you come
& improve my prospects, this place wants only you, to make it perfectly
agreeable, at least to me, who cannot take a Joy in Life w^thout my Madan

[f.56v]

Do you miss me? Or does absence begin to Grow cosy to you? Tell me
your whole Heart, have not I a right to its most secret thoughts? If y^t right
Is due to a faithful Friendship – to a Tender, Unalterable Love – I may
Venture to say I have – I Love you, My Dearest Life, with a Passion y^t
words were never formed to Express – your Health & constant Happiness xx
Is y^e Strongest wish of my soul, I never Imagine a Joy or frame an Idea
Of complete satisfaction for my self, y^t you do not begin, & End: I desire
To Live no Longer then I can conduce to your Happiness, while you can
Continue to Love me, And make me part of y^t happiness, I am of
Consequence in y^e world {^^{& ye most completely Blest creatures in it}} – but if ever I am unhappy enough to survive
your regard, if you change Love, for Respect, & Look with coldness, &
Indifference on me, instead of Tenderness, & Love – w^t can Support me, &
Reconcile me to my self – all my Value, is what you give me in your
Esteem – your Love – If Heaven will grant my most ardent wishes,
I shall Live, & Dye, in y^e full Possession of Both. remember, my Dear
Soul, my fate in this world is in your hands – My Peace, my every
Joy Depends on you - & in y^t Dependence consists my greatest happiness,
The Sympathy between us is too strong, not be lasting – adieu my Dear
Life! till to morrow –
Tuesday morning – I reserved a small part of my paper, till to day, I am
Pleased y^t not one whole day should pass w^th: my giving you some mark of
Continual remembrance of you, My Dear, Dear, Creature! W^th what more
Then Impatience do I wish for your Return? Think when you set out for
This place, then is a mortal, on xxx whom your sight will Bestow perfect happiness
My Best Loved angel! Believe it is not in y^e power of fate to make
Me less y^rs, in Heart, & Soul, & every thought & inclination of Both,
No fate, no Fame, no Fortune can remove
The Well placed Bans of my Constant Love