667 - Judith Madan to Martin Madan, 1724

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Image #1 of letter: Judith Madan to Martin Madan, 1724

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Image #2 of letter: Judith Madan to Martin Madan, 1724
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Friday Morn: 1724
[May 1]

My Dear Dear Madan

I can no more pass a Day wthout dedicating
some part of it to you, then I can injoy one wthout seeing you --- I would
fancy to days post would bring me a Letter from you, but am disappointed and
must defer ye Happiness I propose’d from it, till Sunday, wch sure will bless
me with a Line from yt Dear hand, I have so many times kiss’d with
Transport. Dearest, Best Creature! By wt Expressions shall I discribe ye sence
I have of your Goodness & ye numberless obligations I have to you? to you I owe
more then Life, a just relish of it, you, my Angel! First taught me to love, &
since have show’d me a yet higher Degree of Happiness, yt of being Belov’d:
could you know how Infinitly dear to me, all ye arguments of your
Tenderness are, I am sure you would be good, & generous enough to set a
value on my gratitude & say, you were Paid. How do you pass your
time? How often do you think of Her who never Ceases thinking of you? I
believe I was as much Form’d by nature to love you, as you were to be a
Sufficient Excuse for me, to Love any man beside your self, in ye manner
deseveing of men, is my Distinction, & Pride – ye only species of Pride
I can Pardon my self for. Thou Dear Object of my Eternal Love &
unwearie’d fondnes! how many times have my endeavours to Express my Heart
Ended only in, Dear Madan I love you I never attempted to tell you
how much, nor ever will, for all I can say falls too far short of wt: I
continuly feel in my soul for you since you went, I have read all

[f.35v]

ye Spectators ever, ye Dr read to us ye last Happy Day we liv’d together, I please
my self with reviewing ye passages you lik’d, & took notice of, & reflecting how you
smil’d at some parts of ye good old Knights character – how precious were
those moments! How happy, ye melancholy tender ones we afterwards pass’d in
mutual fondnes, & greif! Dear Creature! wt did not your lovely, belov’d Eyes
make me feel, wn they melted for my misfortune, & told me more eloquently ye Sentiments of your soul, then all ye Language upon Earth could have
Done – If I am blest enough to see you again I will as Moneses says
---- own, I ought not to complain
Since yt sweet Hour is worth whole years of Pain.
I will Defer ye rest til to morrow, yt a Day may not pass without my convers=
=ing with you – Saterday morn. I am just set down to tell, my soul
yt ye near approach of a Letter from him, is at once great pleasure & pain
to me, I shall wait at ye window with an impatience only like yt I shall
find in my self, when I am blest enough to Expect himself: remember me
My Dearest Life, & recollect now, & then ye thousand assurences of Eternal
Love & truth, you in Hours of fondness have given me, you are by promise
to be forever mine – as for me, Death its self is more Dreaded by me
as wt will Divide me from you, then as wt will shut me from all
other scene of gaity, & happiness ye world can afford – farwel, my
Dearest friend – my faithfull lover – my only Bliss, & in one word
Dear, everlastingly Dear Husband. Yours Intirely, & Tenderly
J Madan
Sunday noon. I have {^this} moment rec:{^d} my Dear Madans wish’d for
Letter, I am resolv’d to think my self completely happy even at this Distance
from you, since you think of me, & remember me with ye tenderness I set so
high a value in – my next wish is for another testimony of your Love
rememberence, Dear Dear Soul, don’t miss a Post: I have kiss’d your Dear
Letter a thousand times – fill yr paper next time you write & always
for I can never see too much of that faithfull, Generous, Tender, belov’d heart of yrs
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