How is it Possible for me to fancy
you as Sencire as I would have you, wⁿ an
Opera nay one you did not Like, could make
you Leave me? I would not say thus
much before you went, because you would then
certain have p^d me y^e complement of
staying – I would never Rob you of anything
you call Divertion & besides cannot be
Willing to have even your Company by Constraint.
O Madan! I Confess I Love you too tenderly
to hear w^t has the Least Colour of Indifference
had not this Night air something of it?
I once would not discover y^e Sentiments of my
Heart to you wⁿ I could Easily have done So, &
now I have as much Almost, of that xxx
Inclination, I have Lost y^e Power I had over
my Self, & you see my Very Soul – If I

[f.26v]

have a Wish there you are not concern’d in
May I be as miserable as your Hateing me
could make me Judge then how I can bear
to be Neglected – I would not have left
you – Pope might have talk’d or Cuiiono
sung, In vain – there is more Wit, &
musick in a voice we love & y^e Harmony of
agreeing Sentiment – I have not seen a
Human Creature since you left me – I have
had time for Reflection – have you any Notion
of the Pain of Doubt? if you have, you
may perhaps imagin part of what this melan=
=choly evening gave me – I judge of you by
My Self - & ask my Heart – if I could have
been solicitious enough about an Opera, to
have sacrifice’d to it, 3 hours of y^r Conversation,
My Heart answers no – how then could you
act Differently from a Soul, y^t sure in some
Respects is agreeable to your own – you –
may

[f.27]

perhaps wish to see me soon – when I may
be Engag’d – it may be in the vast affair
of Direction – think then of this – and
Remember, I have not had Power to keep y^e
only man on Earth I was born to Love a
moment.
I know you’l say {^a} Thousand things in
Excuse of y^r self – but nothing you can say
can ever make me as Easie, & Happy as I
once fancy’d my self – Tis now near Ten a
Clock – I shall not sleep to Night – write
to me in the morn^g & let me know whether
you continue to Love me or not – I dread
to find my self Deceiv’d – I would not
Have you see me at this moment – My Heart
is in my Eyes – adieu! My Dearest
Best Freind
J Cowper
Almost Ten a clock

1723

How is it Possible for me to fancy
you as Sincere as I would have you, wⁿ an
Opera nay one you did not Like, could make
you Leave me? I would not say thus
much before you went, because you would then
certain have p^d me y^e complement of
staying – I would never Rob you of anything
you call Diversion & besides cannot be
Willing to have even your Company by Constraint.
O Madan! I Confess I Love you too tenderly
to hear w^t has the Least Colour of Indifference
had not this Night air something of it?
I once would not discover y^e Sentiments of my
Heart to you wⁿ I could Easily have done So, &
now I have as much Almost, of that xxx
Inclination, I have Lost y^e Power I had over
my Self, & you see my Very Soul – If I

[f.26v]

have a Wish there you are not concerned in
May I be as miserable as your Hating me
could make me Judge then how I can bear
to be Neglected – I would not have left
you – Pope might have talked or Cuiiono
sung, In vain – there is more Wit, &
music in a voice we love & y^e Harmony of
agreeing Sentiment – I have not seen a
Human Creature since you left me – I have
had time for Reflection – have you any Notion
of the Pain of Doubt? if you have, you
may perhaps imagine part of what this melan=
=choly evening gave me – I judge of you by
My Self - & ask my Heart – if I could have
been solicitous enough about an Opera, to
have sacrificed to it, 3 hours of y^r Conversation,
My Heart answers no – how then could you
act Differently from a Soul, y^t sure in some
Respects is agreeable to your own – you –
may

[f.27]

perhaps wish to see me soon – when I may
be Engag’d – it may be in the vast affair
of Direction – think then of this – and
Remember, I have not had Power to keep y^e
only man on Earth I was born to Love a
moment.
I know you'll say {^a} Thousand things in
Excuse of y^r self – but nothing you can say
can ever make me as Easy, & Happy as I
once fancied my self – Tis now near Ten a
Clock – I shall not sleep to Night – write
to me in the morn^g & let me know whether
you continue to Love me or not – I dread
to find my self Deceived – I would not
Have you see me at this moment – My Heart
is in my Eyes – adieu! My Dearest
Best Friend
J Cowper
Almost Ten a clock

1723